A Sense of Time
by Jane Moss
Summary: *COMPLETE!!!* plz r&r! Post ‘Inside the Box’. Here’s what COULD happen. ;) G/S!!
1. She Knows

DISCLAIMER: The usual applies (characters are not mine, no profit, etc). You didn't think I'd forget a disclaimer and let you sue me, did you? *raises eyebrow* 

SUMMARY: Post 'Inside the Box'. Here's what COULD happen. ;)

A Sense of Time 

By Jane Moss

Time wasn't clearly defined. So, when Grissom opened his eyes, he couldn't be sure if it was day or night, if he'd been asleep for hours or days. As soon as he familiarised himself with consciousness, he looked around, slowly moving his sore neck. Something stopped him from making a full turn of his head as he tried to look for a window. He could see the faint glow of the city lights and knew that the sky must have indeed been dark. These days, the only darkness he had in sleep was from the artificial blinds at his window. He _lived_ in darkness most of the time.

He looked in the other direction, trying to turn his head gently. Again, something prevented his from laying the side of his head flat on the pillow and he guessed it to be bandages.

SARA? What was she doing here? He immediately felt his blood speed up in his brief moment of panic. Even though his scope of vision prevented him from seeing her fully, he could make out her distinctively dark hair at his side. Her body was on a chair, while her head rested on his crisp hospital sheets, at his side. His brief gush of annoyance and may be even anger soon faded as he accepted that she did indeed find out and there was nothing he could do about it now. He wondered if Catherine told her willingly and couldn't help feeling somewhat betrayed by her. He didn't want Sara to see him like this. But she already has…

He took a deeper breath as his eyes scanned the ceiling. He went in at around 1pm and now it was dark. Were there any complications? DID IT WORK? He panicked when he realised that he hadn't heard a sound yet. He considered waking Sara, but decided against it as soon as it crossed his mind. She deserved to get some sleep. Bad news could always wait. It was his fault he'd waited so long to admit this to himself. He wished he could have mustered up the courage to tell her himself, instead of her having to find out from someone else. It seemed easier to tell Catherine first, because the more you care about a person the harder it is to tell them something so personal. Catherine was in charge of graveyard now. The knowledge was mandatory. She guessed it by then anyway. Had he avoided Sara to keep from giving her any clues? She would have no doubt figured it out sooner.

Her head shifted. He held his breath until she was still again. Okay, so it was the middle of the night. Wasn't she supposed to be at work? What was she doing here instead of handling the big case?

He had no real contact with most of his body as he made no attempt to move yet and his skin was somewhat numb from sleep. The position he was lying in was rapidly becoming uncomfortable and he lifted his feet closer up the mattress, so that his knees were bent. He let out a breath of satisfaction, before looking over at Sara who was shifting again. He lay as still as he could, but it was no use. Her eyes opened, first blank and unfocused, in a daze of sleep, then clear and tired. Should he pretend he was still asleep? May be she would go away? No, not Sara… too many questions. She looked up and slowly, without leaving his gaze, lifted herself off the pillow to look straight into his eyes. She didn't say anything. There was a red imprint from the sheets on one side of her face, but she didn't seem aware of it. He found it so hard to read her eyes, but they were expressive now seemed to be screaming with hurt and apprehension. That's just what he needed right now.

He looked away, trying to pretend he was admiring the blank hospital room. Faint. Very faint sound. He turned to her. Her lips moved and that distant echo came again. He could hear. The bandages were muffling the sounds, but he retained at least some hearing. At first glance, the operation seemed to be successful. Though if the lapses in hearing continued, it meant inevitable deafness someday.

"Yes, I can hear you, Sara, but very faintly," he answered, after reading her lips to reassure himself. His own voice sounded as if his ears were blocked.

When he thought she would question him further, Sara was content at staring, just for the time being. Feeling the need to clear some things from the thick air between them, Grissom spoke, "Aren't you working tonight?"

'Work. Trust him to avoid the meaningless subject', she thought sarcastically. "I'm off tonight" She wondered if he heard her and took it as a yes when he didn't question further.

"Did Catherine tell you?" His voice was cold. That hit a sensitive chord. He shared this with Catherine but not with her. He didn't want her to know. She was just another CSI to him. He noted the brief gush of emotion in her eyes before she cleared her voice to help it sound impersonal.

"Not willingly. She only gave me the hospital," she paused, trying to make her accent clearer for him, "I figured out the rest"

He tried to nod. His backside was so sore. He wouldn't be able to lie on his side, in fear of pressing down too hard on the bandages, so he remained in the uncomfortable position. Knowing himself, it would not take long for him to feel frustration over this. 

Grissom felt her hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry if…" she started, "If you didn't want me to find out…" Her words trailed off with a question mark.

"It's ok," he answered, with only a short pause.

She tried to smile, but couldn't. "Would you like some tea?" For a moment he looked puzzled. "TEA," she repeated, feeling awkward for raising her voice in seeming exaggeration.

There was a pause. His mouth was dry. "Sure"

She was gone only for a minute and as hard as he tried to gather his thoughts, it was futile. He closed his eyes and tried to relax. Even if he didn't feel tired, he knew his body required rest after such complex surgery. He didn't hear much. Grissom opened one eye to see if she was back and found her sitting on her chair patiently with a cup in her hand.

"I'm going to lift up the bed a bit," she explained, as she reached behind his pillow and fumbled with a mechanism he couldn't see. Soon he was glad to be in a half sitting position and tried to move slightly on his side to alternate from lying on his numb back. He looked at her. Her eyes looked somewhat kinder, if he was not mistaken. She handed him the warm cup with a hint of a smile and he couldn't help but return it. Even if his hearing goes, at least he'd still have something left from their encounter here and now. As the warm liquid touched his lips, he realised he was glad for the company. Not just any company… but hers. Was this something worth voicing? He always kept things to himself, because he could never get them out right. Then again, sometimes more harm could be done by staying silent.

"I'm glad you're here"

She looked happy, but only inwardly. "I'm glad you're okay" They shared a moment, before breaking the eye contact. 

After a longer silence, he spoke again. "Do you know where the lavatory is?" Although he didn't feel the need to get up, he knew that it was probably wise to empty his bladder. 

"Ugh… yeah… can you get up?" She would have slapped herself for such a stupid question. He still felt somewhat numb and stiff, as he slowly and carefully rotated himself so that his legs hung down from the side of the bed. Sara stood close in case he needed support. "Do you have any slippers?" Sara said and went to look under the hospital bed. They got moved deep under the bed and she had to get on her knees to retrieve them. Grissom felt somewhat awkward, having Sara take care of him. She placed the slippers under his feet and looked up. Just as he was about to move off the bed, she halted his movements and quickly ran behind him to wheel the drip from the IV on his arm, so that it wouldn't get yanked as he moved to get up. He smiled again at her thoughtfulness. Who else would do this for him? 

Wordlessly, she took his elbow, ready to support his weight, should he lose his balance. He could feel her warm arm very close to his skin. Grissom stood for a moment, getting used to it, before attempting to walk. 

"Just take small steps" Her voice was less muffled by the bandages, when it was closer. They walked together slowly, almost awkwardly, as he tried his best to control his stiff muscles. With her free hand, Sara tugged at the drip, which squeaked on its wheels behind them. There was a faint light coming from the corridor. When they finally made it out the room, he could only see an empty corridor with a nurse at the desk, who looked up at them from a distance. He realised that most patients were asleep.

Grissom looked up at the disabled sign at the lavatory door. "Sara, I'm not…"

"It's closer… I know you're not," she looked at him with a hint of a smile in her eyes. "You're gonna be okay?"

"I'm fine," he offered one of his timid-looking smiles, before her entered the lavatory.

"Okay" Sara tried to distract herself with a clock, which was the only object adoring the blank hospital wall. She walked back and forth, softly stepping on the heels so that they won't make a sound. She looked down at the work outfit; she hadn't had a chance to change. 

Grissom came out, almost modestly holding the opening at the back of his robe, as he pulled the drip from behind him. He seemed more comfortable walking, so Sara chose to only take his IV liquid for him, as they made it back to the bed. When he lay back down, he realised he was tired. Sara settled down on her chair. 

"You should get some sleep," she touched his hand without thinking but refused to take it away, when he looked down at it. She gave his hand a gentle squeeze, and when she realised his hand was cooler than hers, she got up and raised the covers higher for him, only to find they were hardly warm. Remembering her bag, Sara reached down to it and retrieved her blanket, which after unfolding, she covered him with. Grissom could only admire her, as he could not find the words to tell her anything remotely appreciative of her care.

"Thank you," he offered as genuinely as he could.

"Get some sleep," she said softly. He could not hear it this time, but only nodded and once her hand found itself on his once more, Grissom closed his eyes. The anaesthetic was definitely wearing off, but it still put him to sleep in less than a minute. He enjoyed the feeling.

After watching him for several minutes, Sara leaned back in her chair and tried to escape her tired body.

*        *         *         *         *

Tell me what you think and I'll post more! I just hope the REAL season 4 goes as well as this! LOL! (This story will definitely be finished!) – J.M.:)


	2. Passing Time

DISCLAIMER: The usual applies (characters are not mine, no profit, etc). You didn't think I'd forget a disclaimer and let you sue me, did you? *raises eyebrow* 

SUMMARY: Post 'Inside the Box'. Here's what COULD happen. ;)

A Sense of Time 

By Jane Moss

Grissom realised he was sad to see her leave that morning. Her pager went off and he knew intuitively it was back to work. He only wished she could have had a more comfortable night. If Sara slept very little, this was probably a record for her. He could see how tired she was, before she left. 

He found it almost maddening to spend a whole day by himself, when Sara's company was still lingering in the back of his mind as an ironic comparison. Grissom was glad for all the crossword puzzles he had brought with him, expecting to spend time with himself. 

At around noon, his doctor came by to fill him in on information that he already had. There was nothing more he could tell Grissom. He couldn't guarantee 100% restoration of his hearing or even guarantee to keep it where it was. Grissom only nodded and thanked the doctor out of courtesy. That was the only eventful thing that day. He had breakfast, he had lunch, but after that the thought of hospital food was repulsive. He found himself yearning for something homemade.

"You've got to eat something, otherwise you won't get better," a tall black nurse explained to him, as if he didn't understand her.

"Alright, I'll have something to eat," he assured her and she watched him closely until he took some rice and bread on his plate. The sauce didn't look too appealing and the meat from a can looked even worse. He couldn't eat more than a spoonful of the dry rice, before he had to put it down and get back to his crossword and puzzles to keep his mind off the hunger.

He hated to admit it, but he found himself waiting for Sara to show. She promised to see him that evening, but he knew that if something came up he couldn't let himself feel disappointed. Gradually, his attention shifted from the word puzzles in his hand, to the door.

When he opened his eyes, he realised he must have dozed off. Sara stood in front of him, smiling. It was such a rare sight. He didn't mind her knowledge of his condition now and had to admit it felt like a weight had been lifted. 

"Hey"

"Sara… I thought you might not show…" When her smile faded, he wondered if he said something wrong. May be his tone was too cold? "I'm glad you're here," he added as a means of apology.

"Catherine couldn't make it. I told her you're okay," Sara delivered the news without a hint of emotion. She sat down, as softly as she could. Her jacket smelled of the outside world. Of rain, to be exact. She looked over at his untouched dinner and cringed at the thought of hospital food. 

He followed her gaze. "I couldn't eat what they serve here. It's worse than McDonalds. At least there you can't _taste_ that it's bad for you" She smiled at that. She was glad of his good mood. May be that's what isolation did to a man.

"I anticipated this," she shuffled her bags until she brought out a small salad box filled with spaghetti and handed it to him. A second smaller box had salad. "It was the only thing I knew how to make," she offered as he inspected the spaghetti.

"It's very thoughtful, Sara"

"Thanks. Hadn't had a chance to eat either," she said, getting out another box, filled with what appeared to be mushrooms and something else. They ate in silence. It felt comfortable this time. After a while, his curiosity took over.

"Are you going to stay?"

"Yeah" Before he could ask, she continued, "Catherine said they could handle it. We almost got the cases wrapped up."

He looked at her seriously. "Sara, you need to get some sleep tonight"

"I will"

"Not in this chair"

"I'll be fine" he didn't look satisfied. "Hey, I did it last night!"

"You were tired this morning," he said raising his signature eyebrow. She couldn't debate with that.

"Look, if you want me to leave or something-"

"Sara, I don't, but-"

"I'm staying here then"

He let out a breath of exasperation as he once again turned to the ceiling. Sara was not someone who he wanted to argue with, which was mostly due to her inevitable victory. The lights were gone now and the room was once again dark. They sat in silence for the longest time. This was as close as one could get to this man. 

Grissom tried to reason. If he could not convince her to go home, he could at least attempt to make her comfortable, as she had done for him the last couple of days.

"Sara…" he tried to keep his voice reasonably quiet, as he moved over to the side of his bed. She looked at him in confusion, before it hit her.

"Oh no, Grissom, you don't have to… I'll be-"

"Sara," he paused, "Please, it's the least I can do" After another moment of her hesitation he made it into a logical argument. "You need your rest"

She took a breath, before slowly and timidly venturing closer. She lay down stiffly, determined to keep some distance between them, but the bed was too narrow for two people and they had to move closer, until their side touched firmly. It was somewhat alien to both to feel that kind of warmth radiating from another human being. Sara felt both exhilarated and unusually calm at a moment like this. Calm, of course, apart from the wild beating of her own heart.

After a while, when they were both considerably relaxed, Grissom realised that neither the anaesthetic nor the morphine could help him now and he was going to have to find sleep on his own. He reached out and gently pulled the covers over Sara and now there was only one layer of clothing between them. He shivered involuntarily and mentally blamed the thin hospital robe he was wearing. He should have really brought a set of pyjamas. She must have felt it, as she reached out and brought the covers up to his neck, tucking him in at the other side, thereby bringing her arm around him in the process. He exhaled at the additional contact and she took it as a sign to leave her arm where it was.

*        *         *         *         *

Yeah…. Sara is being super sweet to him! Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed! *grin* those things always make my muse super happy! More soon! (promise!) – J.M.:)


	3. Fighting Time

DISCLAIMER: The usual applies (characters are not mine, no profit, etc). You didn't think I'd forget a disclaimer and let you sue me, did you? *raises eyebrow* 

SUMMARY: Post 'Inside the Box'. Here's what COULD happen. ;)

A Sense of Time 

By Jane Moss

Grissom woke to the delightful feeling of having someone warm in his arms. He wondered what exactly drove him to offer his bed to her. Whatever it was, it definitely wasn't logic. He knew that he was very close to falling off the side of the bed, but it seemed so cruel to wake her. She worked so hard. Pretty soon, he knew he would feel numb again from being in the same position for too long. He let out a breath and realised how much he had missed the human contact. But this was _Sara_! Her arm was around him and her face was buried in his shoulder. He could easily feel her warm breath though the thin hospital robe. He wondered what it would be like to wake up like that every morning and immediately tried to forget the thought.

It felt so good right now, but he convinced himself it was only a temporary feeling, considering all the things he's been through recently. After all, he was her supervisor, older by so many years…

She stirred and moved her head from his shoulder, waking up very slowly. Before she had a chance to open her eyes and they would fall back into professional mode, Grissom decided to indulge himself, as he gently brushed hair away from her cheek. Suddenly, feeling the need to move, he got up as smoothly as he could and walked around to the chair she occupied last night. Walking felt easier now. Looking at her, he remembered his bandaged ears and recalled his strange reflection in the mirror the previous night. Not that he was overly conscious about his appearance, but he did not want anyone else from work to see him like this. Being on a hospital bed, makes one seem vulnerable. His fingertips slowly brushed against the bandages and he knew he wanted them off, as soon as possible. 

Something beeped loud enough to make him jump slightly. Sara now turned over and tried to reach something by the side of the bed. He caught her arm, before she could fall off. She opened her eyes in confusion and it took her a moment to register where she was and what Grissom was doing next to her bed. He passed her one of the bags, assuming that's where her pager would be.

"Oh, shit… I'm late for work!" she said rubbing her eyes to clear her vision. "I can't believe this! I'm always early!"

Grissom smiled, despite himself. "I'm sure your boss will forgive you"

"When are you getting out of here?" her eyes did not meet his, as she occupied herself with reaching for her bags.

"Sometime today"

She looked up. "I'll come by and pick you up, okay? Just give me a call…. You know my number right?"

He nodded. "I do"

Just as she was ready to gather up her belongings and get up to go, she looked up at him and placed her hand on his bare forearm. It was warm.

"Thanks," she said, meaning it.

"Anytime"

"_Any_time?" she smiled coyly, walking out the door. "I'll see you later then"

*         *         *

When she received Grissom's phone call, Sara had to ask Warrick to handle the case on his own. Twenty minutes later they were both in her car. His bandages were replaced with what looked like large earplugs and he was told to remove them in two days time and to avoid loud noises for at least a week, until it heals.

He looked over at Sara, whose attention was in the road. He knew she must still have questions, but kept them to herself, while he was in hospital. She didn't want to cause him stress and she was surprised at her own patience. She knew that she was probably being far nicer, than he really deserved.

She walked him to his door. "Would you like to come in?"

It was tempting. "Ugh… I have to get back… I told Warrick I wouldn't abandon him."

He nodded. Grissom knew he didn't have the right to ask her if she would come after shift. She'd already given up two nights for him.

"Sara, thank you… for everything"

She nodded. "I'm really glad you're okay." They stood at his door for a moment until she felt it was time to leave. "I'm… gonna get back to that crime scene…"

"Okay" OKAY? She looked somewhat disappointed. What was he thinking? He wasn't okay with her leaving. "Sara," he called out, making her turn around, "If you'd like to come… any time…" he stressed, "I'd be glad to have you here."

She smiled. "I'll come by."

He stood at the threshold of his apartment until she disappeared from his sight.

*         *         *

He spent most of the remaining morning going through a small stack of mail and messages on his machine. Later he checked his emails. By mid-afternoon, Catherine came by to inspect on him back from hospital. 

"Having fun as supervisor?" he teased.

"Grissom, you have got to have THE most boring job! I still have stacks of paperwork on my… your desk. I worked for the entire morning signing reports and I haven't even done half of them!" she paused, not wanting to sound nagging, "How's Sara?"

"She's fine"

"Sorry I couldn't make it to hospital. I planned to go, but Lynsey… It's a long story…" she let out a tired sigh.

"It's alright, Catherine, I know you have a life. Just get through that stack of paperwork before I return, alright?" A smile teased on his face as he sipped his coffee.

Catherine proceeded in filling him in on details of various cases, before she had to leave and by 5o'clock he was alone again. He guessed he still had a few hours of sunlight, before it went dark. Grissom wondered what he could occupy himself with for the seven days he had to avoid work. Looking over at his computer, he decided to initiate a few emails with old acquaintances he neglected to keep in touch with, over the years. He briefly wondered if they all still remembered him. 

Soon, running out of people to email, he considered calling a few, but he could not bear all the questions. A thought hit him. He entered the lab's database, through his computer at work. Someone suggested this service to him and he guessed it was now good time to put it to use. He clicked on the "Employees" folder and for the first time felt like he was finally becoming computer literate, as he searched for "Sidle, Sara". He clicked and her file came up. He scanned the page until he came across "contact details" and copied her email address.

He wrote a brief note to her, saying nothing in particular and nothing new. Then he in turn sent a message to Catherine. Glancing at the clock, he decided to email Warrick and Nick about their case as well. After all the emails were sent, Grissom sat back and wondered what he could do next. Did he really have a life outside of work? His only close friends – or may be not so close – were his co-workers. That really said something about him. He hardly spent any time at his apartment. The TV and VCR were standing quietly on the shelves and gathering dust. They were doing so very nicely. And what do you do when you run out of trivial errands?

After much deliberation, staring at his computer screen, a curious thought crossed his mind. If only the security cameras in the lab could be connected to his computer there and he could access it from home. Oh, the fun he would have! Just their shock and confusion on their faces, would be ever so amusing to see. He could finally find out who had been chewing his pencils… Well, that was not in his limited computer capability. He shook his head trying to forget the thought, as it reminded him too much of what the lab rat, Greg, might think of.

The rest of the day passed slowly, as he proceeded to read the papers and cook dinner for himself. The earplugs were starting to irritate him somewhat and he had to restrain himself from pulling them out.

*        *         *         *         *

Okay, so there wasn't much Sara in this chapter! Don't worry! The next one's gonna improve on that! lol! Thank you all for the lovely reviews, as always! (keep them coming and I'll hurry with the next chappy!) – J.M.:)


	4. In the Dark

DISCLAIMER: The usual applies (characters are not mine, no profit, etc). You didn't think I'd forget a disclaimer and let you sue me, did you? *raises eyebrow* 

SUMMARY: Post 'Inside the Box'. Here's what COULD happen. ;)

A Sense of Time 

By Jane Moss

Sara arrived a few hours after the streets went dark. Now that they closed the case, she would have to slip back into nightshift. This was her last time working days. Sara had to admit that work hasn't been running as smoothly without Grissom, but nevertheless she couldn't complain, as she saw him after work. Being completely honest to herself, she could have never seen it happen, especially after he refused her dinner invitation so bluntly just weeks before. She wondered if she should really be so forgiving after what he'd put her through the last few months. Old grudges had to be let go, as she could not ruin what they achieved now for the sake of pride.

Soon, she was standing at his door, her instinct briefly rendering her unsure whether to knock loudly or run away before it's too late. She tried to laugh off her own childishness at something so trivial. She had spent the last two nights with this man, for God's sake! Before she could debate the issue further, her hand knocked firmly on the door of its own accord. Then again, this was his _house_. His personal space.

"Sara?" she heard him ask from the other side.

"Yeah, it's me!" Sara raised her voice, to be sure she was heard.

He opened the door and looked somewhat pleased by her presence. She wondered if it was due to her visit or his previous isolation. A little bit of both?

"Please come in," he stood back.

"Thanks" After he had closed the door behind her she made a move to take off her light jacket. "Why is it so dark in here?" she asked as he made his way deeper into the apartment.

"No reason," he called back cryptically. "Please make yourself at home" he looked at her briefly before dropping his head to the side and disappearing into another room. She smiled to herself at seeing his signature move. Something smelled delicious. Sara wanted to follow the scent but curiosity held her back. The living room was indeed in semi-darkness, but the bright lights of Vegas provided enough illumination to see quite clearly. She quickly began to inspect anything interesting lying on tables and shelves. Books, journals… Technically, it _was_ out in the open. She stored a mental picture of the room she guessed he spent most of his time in… when he was awake, at least.

"Would you like something to drink?"

Sara jumped slightly, at the sound of his voice.

"Umm… what have you got?"

"Wine?"

She looked surprised for a moment before answering, "Sure"

"I never got to try this one," he came back with a bottle of 'Chianti Classic' and two glasses in his hands. "Never seem to have the right company" What exactly did he mean by _right_ company?

"Thanks" She didn't know what else she could say. "So… um… what's with the lights?" He looked puzzled for a moment. "The LIGHTS" she repeated.

"I heard you, Sara"

"Sorry" She was sure if it weren't for the darkness he would have seen her blush.

"It's quite alright. My eyes got tired today. I was at the computer a lot to pass the time. They sting less in the darkness"

"Hmm…" she sipped her wine, "Working days and seeing real sunlight sure doesn't compare with those artificial lamps. Until now, I was worried of becoming a zombie!"

He quickly swallowed his wine to keep from spilling it as he chuckled. 

"And I suppose that goes for real darkness as well… though I just wish I could see exactly what I'm drinking," she looked down at her glass.

Grissom pursed his lips in thought only briefly before leaving his seat in search of something. In a moment he was back and when he lighted a match, she could see it was a candle. Suddenly the atmosphere in the room shifted to warm and intimate and she wondered if it was Grissom's intent or merely a side effect.

"Grissom?" She continued when she had his full attention. "Why didn't you tell me?" His brows knitted together in confusion. "About your hearing…"

She was serious and probably still upset. He looked down at his feet, taking a breath, in an attempt to find the right words. He didn't know how to explain it the right way. "It was something personal. I didn't want anyone to know."

"You told Catherine," Sara pressed further, watching him squirm. He wouldn't meet her eyes and soon she looked away as well. "Do you really trust me so little?"

"Sara, it's not like that and you know it-"

"I KNOW it?" she raised her voice, but immediately remembered his recent operation and forced herself to calm down. "You sure have done a lot to show me…"

There was a long silence before he spoke again. "Catherine had to know. She was replacing me as supervisor." Sara looked down. She knew he would put up the logical argument. "I meant to tell you. I thought it would be easier after the surgery. If it turned out fine you wouldn't have the need to worry and if it failed, you'd have found out anyway..."

"Only you wouldn't have told me if it worked, would you?" Sara looked straight at him. "There would be no need"

"Sara, I'm sorry you're upset, but I feel it was still my decision," he defended himself.

"I'm not angry because of me," she shook her head, "How could you face something like that alone? Didn't you think we'd be there for you if you'd just told any of us?"

Why suddenly move to the plural? "Are you talking about yourself or the lab?"

"I-"

"Sara, look at me, please"

She let out a breath. "_I_ would have been there for you," she clarified staying silent for a moment, "I just keep saying it over and over again and you just never seem to listen."

Grissom stared at her in confusion once more. Sometimes this woman was really too much for him to figure out. "I don't know what to say," he told her honestly.

"It's confusing, right?" she repeated her earlier words.

After a long uncomfortable pause, Sara was sure that they were back to square one and as soon as she would make the move to leave, they would get back to their game of masquerade, feigning professionalism and indifference.

"Are you hungry?"

What was he planning to do? Treat her to a nice dinner by candlelight and then just pretend it never happened?

"No" Sara looked on at the single candle on the table in front of them. How sad it was that there was no way around some things. She couldn't do this by herself. If he was not prepared to give her anything, then what difference did it make to her? It was her life. She didn't need him, if he didn't want her. Why did it have to be so utterly difficult with this man? 

Sara felt him sit softly by her side. He was very close and for a moment she remembered the warmth she felt last night. She took a slow breath before she lifted her eyes up to his, deciding to mask nothing. For the very last time.

He was so close. She let herself reach out and touch his cheek with her warm hand. It was his mild surprise, which prompted her to keep it there and gently stroke his face with her thumb. 

"Sara…" His breathing was irregular and he had to look down, breaking their eye contact. She could see the internal battle he was facing. Suddenly he was unsure and indecisive.

"Would you like me to stop?"

He placed his hand over hers to keep it there. "Sara, I… this isn't right…"

"Meaning… this is not what you want?" her eyes were searching his.

"I'm so much older than you…"

Her features softened. "That's okay." There was a hint of a smile on her lips as she touched his other cheek so that she cradled his face in her hands. He felt enveloped in her warmth.

"Sara," he placed his hand on her wrist, "I'm your supervisor..."

"Shh…" she looked at his lips before their eyes locked once more. "Nobody will find out if you don't want them to," she said, her voice soft, persuasive and completely irresistible to him. Her hot breath lingered on his lips. At that moment all he could hear was his own wild heartbeat. At that moment all he could do was hold himself against the strong force of attraction. 

Suddenly she leaned forward and gently tasted his soft lips. It was almost intoxicating. He leaned in and claimed her mouth, as his arms snaked to her back to press her closer and closer. Her hands stroked his neck and back madly as their kiss grew in their hunger for each other.

Suddenly he pushed her back to catch his ragged breath. He looked at her seriously. "Sara… I won't be able to let go… ever."

"Who says I'll let _you_ go?" she smiled, teasingly, before pushing him back on the sofa and getting on top of him.

THE END

*        *         *         *         *

There! Finished! I would like to thank everyone who reviewed! *bows* Thank you all! I hope I can get my muse to write some more! – J.M.:)


End file.
